Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Randomize
