this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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