i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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