when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
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