Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Randomize
