What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
