I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
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