Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize