Her vagina should come with caution tape.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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