clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize