dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
even my farts smell like vagina
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
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