I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
third nipple confirmed
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize