Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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