i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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