so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
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hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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