I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
