Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize