Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(207): View more from Maine

I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section

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(479): View more from Arkansas

he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha

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(402): View more from Nebraska

P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(859): View more from Kentucky

I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn

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(337): View more from Louisiana

i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.

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(703): View more from Virginia

I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.

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(417): View more from Missouri

I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.

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(856): View more from New Jersey

Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night

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