So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
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