i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
accomplished twins. life is a go
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
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