she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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