Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex