Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future