I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Just pee around me
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
he just fucked me for my cheese.