Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize