im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
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So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
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We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
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