Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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