thanks...oh and i got my period
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba