he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
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