How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
