well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Randomize
