Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
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