The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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