I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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