On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize