just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
