New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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