ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
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Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
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I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.