the condom got lost in my hair
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Randomize