I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet