Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize