Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
