No awkward lesbian experiences without me
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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