I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize