we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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