we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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