I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
