Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.