Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize