Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize