Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
